I'm sorry I want you.

I don't think I can take this anymore. I don't know if I can go through this. Why can't I just stop? Is there really no off button for this? I'm so mad at myself for making myself confused! I can act like it's nothing. But the truth is, it's not just nothing. It is really something and it hurts badly.. And I don't know if I can stop. This is all just too hard. I mean, I want this. I know we can work things out. Somehow I really do, but you don't. That's the part there that hurts so much. You make me very confused. I know you told me from the very start that this cannot happen, it is not supposed to. I tried to understand. I tried avoiding you, I tried not talking to you. I tired not to miss you. I tried not to be in the same room with you. I tried, but I failed...and I fell. Don't think that I've not given any thoughts on this, I did. I can't handle this, I'm such a mess. I need to talk to you. Tell me how you do it?

Spending time with you cures me. A hug could also do.
Please call me if you read this. Or text me. Please? ;(